During the summer in the ruthless, social climbing concrete jungle aka the Upper East side of Manhattan, I was a young girl with big ambitions to play in the “big leagues.” As I walked to my internship at a prestigious firm on Park Avenue, I swayed in my designer pumps at the sight of powerful, older men in their natural habitat – work. These men were leaders in their fields, tycoons, the 1% that made this city a Mecca for a trophy wife in training.
I was no Bergdorf blonde, more like Century 21 sales rack, but I desperately wanted to marry a man with a black American Express card. I had done one thing right already, I was in proximity to the millionaires buying morning coffee at the same Starbucks and frequenting the same trendy happy hour spots for cocktails.
What I learned with experience in NYC is that there are three types of millionaires and each requires a different game.
1. The Self-Made Millionaire. Enormously confident and aggressive, usually has a chip on his shoulder from overcoming the odds to build his wealth. Self-starter, curious and hates to be called “new money.” This breed can either be extremely frugal and drive a Toyota while living in a modest house or balls to wall flashy by wearing Gucci/Fendi/Versace everything and driving a Bentley.
The self-made millionaires are very aware of his SMV (societal market value) and is looking for a true trophy-wife. Only models, minor actresses or 9s or above need apply.
Sex appeal and physical beauty matters the most to this type.
He is usually a thrill of the hunt kind of guy, so giving him the ultimate pursuit is the way to go. Drop texts, wait a long time to return phone calls, and always have dates lined up with other men to make him want to be with you.
2. The Trust Fund Millionaire. This kid has been rich since birth, and even though his lineage may extend back to the Mayflower you won’t find him showing off his Tod’s loafers. “Old money” is snobby and elitist, you certainly need to work your credentials to get into his country club. Trust fund millionaires are more generous with their spending and like “exotic” or “interesting” women. He is usually bored to death or trying to piss off Daddy so any element of foreign or “wrong side of the tracks” girl may be beneficial. Also, you need to be hot but not in the ‘porn star fake boobs’ kind of way.
You need to be entertaining to him. Novelty! Read interesting articles or books and share them with him, cook a homemade meal for him instead of take out and dazzle him with your knowledge of abstract expressionism at the museum.
3. MIT (Million-in-Training). Easily spotted on the college campus, he is the guy in the polo t-shirt who is president of his fraternity with a summer finance internship at an investment bank. He is all about appearances and status and intends to make his first million by 30. More than the other types, the MIT is looking for an equal- a girl who is not like the rest that will be the Hillary to his Bill, the Beyonce to his Jay-Z and will host perfect dinner parties at his perfect mansion while rearing his perfect kids.
You need to hit the books to snatch the MIT and break out the Emily Post etiquette book. Think Stepford wife, not Real Housewife in your attire with nude manicures, minimal makeup and lots of Ralph Lauren/ Lilly Pulitzer. You need to build value in his eyes by showing your competence and ability to navigate any social situation successfully. Best chances of snagging an MIT is on your college campus as they fly off the dating market rapidly.
And as with dating any millionaire, remember to look and act your best at ALL times.
Happy millionaire hunting, dolls!