Beauty is only skin deep.
Beauty is in the eye of the beholder.
It’s what’s on the inside that matters.
All of these statements are true. And, once someone really gets to know you, these statements will prove themselves true. But…they have nothing to do with getting a man. What statement works for that?
You only get one chance to make a first impression.
And yes, I’m writing this article knowing full well that it’s going to generate hate mail. I don’t care. Is it superficial? Sure. Too bad. Welcome to reality. You can be the best person in the world on the inside and still be alone if the outer shell is unattractive. On the flip side, you can be the most beautiful woman in the world, but nobody will want you around if you’re an asshole. But that’s for another article.
So here’s the thing. Men are simple creatures. How do you keep them happy? I’m sure you’ve seen the meme, Men have only two things on their minds, so if you see one without an erection…make him a sandwich. Yup. Pretty much. Feed em and fuck em. Add in the occasional ego stroke and you’re gold.
BUT this works for the man you’ve already got. And now we are back to how to get him. Men like hot. And sexy. And confident. (Of course there are exceptions, but I’m keeping my demographic broad.) To be hot, you do not have to be skinny. Skinny is what impresses other women. Most men don’t go for it. Generally a man would prefer a woman who is (what she believes is) about ten pounds over weight. But not fat. Yeah yeah, I know…I’m not supposed to say fat. Well guess what? It’s a word. It’s a thing. Don’t be it. Primarily because it is unhealthy. But also cuz it’s not hot.
I’m so tired of listening to women whine about losing men to “skinny bitches.” This is usually while shoveling in happy hour nachos or a bloomin onion or whatever. Ugh. “He should want me for ME!!” they complain. I get it. You are probably an amazing person with a ton of wonderful qualities. A man would be lucky to have you. And yet, you go home alone night after night while the “bimbos” get all the action. Don’t blame the so called bimbos. They are simply playing the game better than you. Smarten up. If you are going to play the game, you may as well play by the rules. So put down the fork and get off your ass.
RULE NUMBER ONE: Men like HOT.
So here you go. Improve your diet, hit the gym now and then, make better choices. Buddy up. It will really help to have a partner. Someone, in addition to yourself, to be accountable to. Someone with whom to share the misery. If you don’t have anyone in your life who fits the bill, find an online support group. FaceBook has a million of them. My sister has recently become a customer of (and now a successful coach for) BeachBody Fitness and The 21 Day Fix. Try it. Or, if that’s too expensive, I really like Melissa Bender of benderfitness.com. She has a TON of workouts and mealplans and it is FREE.
RULE NUMBER TWO: Men like SEXY.
When you go out try this. Leave your hair down and flowing. Fluff it out and make it look as thick and luxurious as possible. Play up your eyes and lips but DO NOT cake on makeup. Generally bright red/pink lips are considered clown-like and a turnoff. Same goes for extreme cat eyes and colored eye shadow. Leave the purple lips and turquoise shadow to Katy Perry. And for God’s sake, don’t drown yourself in perfume. These are all red flags that (to men) scream high maintenance.
What to wear? Pick your favorite asset. Do you have gorgeous legs? Wear a short skirt. Do you have awesome boobies? Wear a fitted top with a scoop neck. Do you have an amazing hour glass figure? Wear a bodycon dress or a snug top with skinny jeans. BUT pick just one! The tight, short, lowcut dress is like a flashing neon sign “please notice me” and again kinda screams high maintenance. Save that look for AFTER you’ve got him. Right now practice less is more and try to leave a little to the imagination. BE SUBTLE. And dress appropriately for the venue. Don’t get all fancied up to hang out in a sports bar. Jeans with a white tank is pretty much the sexiest thing any woman can wear. Seriously. Ask your guy friends.
RULE NUMBER THREE: Men like CONFIDENT.
Once you are well on your way toward hot and you are figuring out sexy, confident will come. You will realize that the above info is right. Less is more and subtle is better than flashing neon. You will start getting more and more attention. You will probably even hear a bitter woman whine, “What’s so special about her?” Booyah! How’s that for a confidence booster?? Kinda petty? Sure. But still… 😉
Another great way to build confidence is to get in touch with your sexuality. I highly suggest signing up for pole dance classes. It’s also a FANTASTIC workout, so…two birds. Here’s a great answer to the question, “Why pole?”
(Click this link if your browser doesn’t show the video.)
So there you have it. Now go get em!